When we are young, and even when we are not, we have a sort of delusion that we are going to live forever in this body. The powerful feelings that we experience as a feeling, or sentient, being long to be honored. This is where vows come in. We long to honor the experiences we have by vowing to allow/never allow something like that to happen again. We bind ourselves to the people we vow to when it is not necessary.
I have read that this tendency to make bonds through chemical alliances is a feature of tribal living. Feelings are chemicals and strong feelings produce an onrush of chemicals. It is a weather system of experiences that leaves the land of our psyche and body altered. We have all heard of dopamine, the pleasure chemical, oxytocin, the bonding chemical, serotonin for happiness/dominance and endorphins for pain relief. We have also heard of cortisol, the stress hormone. Many times we want to put words to these experiences – since the experience is so powerful, it must mean something, right? If someone in my environment is having a strong experience, because it is so strong it must have something to do with me, right? After all, I can feel it!
I can feel her anger, his joy, her relief, his curiosity – – feelings, thoughts and emotions are transmissible because they are energy, and we are primary energetic beings. We are also scientists of meaning and look to “name” everything in our environment in order to get it sorted. As young children, we are very open and very curious and it may be that we use the strong experiences in our environment to associate ourselves with an identity. After all, we are here to choose and discard themes over and over to find one that fits. We all want an identity we can be comfortable with.
Yet what if we aren’t comfortable with the identity we have chosen?
Then, like good scientists, we gather data and do research. Some may research popular culture and find a way of presenting themselves that suits their interests for the moment. Some may turn within and begin looking at natural inclinations and areas that bring a sense of order, peace, and well-being.
After choosing identities, we want to read up on that identity, digest everything there is to know, and then begin morphing into a more complete version of the identity chosen. It is like a worm who studies the butterfly and then goes into a cocoon to design its wings.
The most glorious identity of all is that of a multidimensional being. It affords limitless view points and it is a lovely precursor to being the One. When you are focused on I AM, or as the ONE that creates in an empowered and authentic way, you no longer need to look for an identity because nothing can stick any longer. You are connected within, and this connection serves as the ultimate compass, surpassing any need to define or remain undefined. It is ultimately non-judgment and allowance within discernment.